Beautiful Worlds

Today, I’ve been thinking of some issues that I previously experienced in my past which correlates to others and my own immediate family. It’s about deceptions or not telling the truth. It is cunning or simply cheating?

I reckon that cheaters have an unfair advantage when it comes to betrayal. The only trust in lying is most betrayal goes undetected or unproven because the rules of the game tend to favour those who cheat. Most people have a strong desire to believe what a partner has to say. Trusting a partner creates a sense of security and comfort. Logically, no one really wants to think that a partner may be lying.

Humans were made in an imperfection, so I do think it is common for lovers to tell lies when their partners ask too many pointed questions; provoking ones to be precise. But, this doesn’t mean that it is wrong to ask a partner questions. One even quoted, "Ask me no questions and I'll tell you no lies”. As for me, the person who asks the most questions is often telling the most lie.

Moreover, one rather assume the worst as it is often easier to believe something I like to call a "pleasant lie" than to acknowledge a devastating truth. When one made promises to be faithful, people are more likely to be serious and have every intention of keeping their word. Though personally, it’s easier said than done. I reckon that one’s behaviour is not always ruled by the fact that vows were taken and that promises were made. From time to time, our emotions influence our behaviour and lead us down paths we had no intention of being rootless.

Through experiences and stories I’ve heard, betrayal mostly occurs because people find themselves in situations where their emotions overwhelm them. Situations such as being close on someone other than their partner, spending a lot of one-on-one time with someone else, not feeling close or connected to their partner such as feeling lonely or angry, the feeling that one will not get caught or occasionally, situations that involves alcohol or drugs. Poor decisions were made as for many people finds it is very difficult to always be in control of one's emotions when placed in these situations.

Some says that self restraint and having a high will power can control their emotions and actions. Though, this statement is arguable. Personally, I think that relying on will power or to self restraint correlates to be discipline towards oneself. It’s like dieting I reckon. People make promises they cannot keep. More often, will power and self restraint are not enough to control our usual diets. As for me, to diet successfully needs more drastic measures. A successful dieting often requires a change in lifestyle, environment and social networks.

Well, I am aware of the consequences of cheating are much more severe than the consequences of failing a diet. But the correlation is that most people admit to failing a diet, but not to cheating.

Overall, I reckon that betrayal is a typical human behaviour and is difficult to control. Being faithful to a person is more complicated than simply making promises. Again, easier said than done.

As a conclusion, I think that being faithful to a partner is to avoid situations which bring out the worst in our behaviour. When a partner violates one’s expectations about what is appropriate, we feel betrayed. And so, we just have to bear in mind that relationships are not based on logic, but they are influenced by emotions.